Still Swiping…

When did personal ads become dating apps?

At some point we stopped trying to meet people and started trying to optimize them.

Now everyone is a thumbnail, a slogan, a filtered vacation photo holding a fish or standing in front of a bathroom mirror pretending not to care while caring deeply.

The apps promised unlimited possibilities.

Instead, they created people who can't pick a restaurant.

You ever go out to dinner with someone who spends forty-five minutes reading Yelp reviews while everyone else is starving?

That's modern dating.

Nobody orders. Nobody commits. Everybody keeps staring at the menu wondering if something better is coming.

And the strange part is…people are lonelier than ever.

Barry Schwartz called it "The Paradox of Choice" years ago. Too many options don't make people happier. They make them anxious.

He was talking about consumers.

But honestly, he could have been talking about Hinge.

There are perfectly nice people unable to invest in a first date because somewhere in the back of their mind is the idea that maybe the algorithm still has someone better loading.

So they keep swiping.

And swiping.

And swiping.

Meanwhile, the person they actually liked is sitting at home wondering what happened.

That's why matchmaking still works.

I don't hand people an endless catalog. I hand them a person.

And without fifty other options lined up behind the screen, something interesting happens:

People pay attention.

They show up differently.

Not because the match is perfect.

Because they're finally present.